Sad news

This blog was to keep a digital age record of our adoption journey and to let those interested keep up with us.
It is with deep sorrow we have to then add to this blog the news that adopting Dias is not going to happen. We were informed by our agency 2 days ago that the Kazak side of the team has decided not to complete our adoption or pursue any others in the city that Dias lives in.
The city (or certain persons) have become hostile to adoption and it has become impossible to conduct business there. We knew there were problems. We were told after our adoption, our agency was going to pull out of that area for now. We thought we'd be getting news in a few weeks that we'd be leaving to go adopt the only other boy as precious as Shawn. But it is not to be. Our agency says they have not given up but admit there is little they can do. We don't know the reasons, it does not make sense and we have no answers for anyone.
We know that our agency and it's staff are excellent and our coordinator and social worker are two of the best with any agency. We were and are, in excellent hands. That is just not enough it seems.
Mike and I are heartbroken. Shawn seems to understand that Dias is not coming here but does not understand why. Well, that makes 3 of us. He still calls him brother and we will alwaysa call him son.
Dias is our child. Dias is Shawn's brother and his aunt's and uncle's nephew and his grandparent's grandson. No one can or ever will change that.
We have had the most loving and generous outpouring of support. We are so blessed in many ways. Several people have said somethings that have resonated within me.
My sister believes that the love we have for Dias is still out in the world and his life is still better and mattered because he is loved and wanted. He does matter to us.
He is well taken care of and with the only people he knows. We do not worry about that thank God. But that can never repalce or compare to him having a family.
This is called a lost referral in adoption lingo. We aren't the first and sadly, won't be the last. In our lingo it is called a heartache and a huge injustice.
We however are celebrating life's other joys, like our son's first tooth out and his starting Kindergarden.
We will not know what is next for a few weeks.
We are going to circle the wagons and just hang on till we feel better.
I have always liked this Chinese proverb and I plan to live by it:
You cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building nests in your hair.
We will forever be thankful for our Kazak child. We also will cherish the opportunity and dream of another child. If that is to be, it will be another blessing, if it is not to be, we are so very blessed still.
Our adoption family of friends are the most awesome people on this planet. I could not get through this without you.