Saturday, January 24, 2009

Home Sweet Home

We are still unpacking but are adjusted again to life at home. I think our sleep patterns are back to normal. But as a friend reminded me, just in time to adjust to Kazakh time again!
Including today, we are 3 days 10 hours away from the waiting period being over. We are starting to get excited about this part of this amazing trip being near completion.
We ate Kazakh tacos (kind of a weird mix of chicken soft tacos and stir fry vegetables with mayo and ketchup) which Shawn now loves too for dinner the other night. Target had the electric hot water kettle like we used in Kazakhstan. Who knew? If we had the steam heated towel rack in the bathroom, we'd almost be in Taldy.....
As we look around this messy house and see Shawn playing and just being the precious little boy he is, we are so very thankful and reflective.
There is never just the right words for people who helped in some of the most important moments of your life, but besides building statues of these people, it is all we have. Mike and I want to thank these people here though.
With a pregnancy and having a child via birth, you only have to have, parts from a man and parts from a woman. In adoption however, it is impossible to have a child without numerous parts and the people that supply these parts are never forgotten.
Starting with our daughter Lauren who has embraced having siblings even though she loved being the only child. She is a huge reason we brought Shawn and Dias to our hearts and home. We loved being her parents and life seemed too long ahead of us without more of that type of love again. She is now 23 and our friend as well as our only daughter.
Grandma Polly and Grandpa TC who number one, are awesome parents, then went on to love their first grandchild like she'd been there for always instead of appearing at age 10. Then to their surprise and joy, went on to have their first Grandson, Shawn, who is the reason they rise everyday. Now, they will have another grandson and could not have been more supportive in all ways including allowing Shawn to maintain some normalcy in his life while mom and dad had to be very far away. We love you so much and this would not have been as enjoyable without you. This is only one part of the dozens of ways you helped us, but the most important one of course.
Grammie and Gedo who are such good grandparents and love having the kids over. Who are a blended family by culture and marriage (a red headed Irish woman and an olive complexed Lebanese man) so seem to understand our blended family as well. Who always have encouragement and support as we all go through this long process. Who have sleepovers and pizza parties. Who had only one grandchild on Grammies side for so long and then embraced having 5 more in a short amount of time and later in life!
Mike and I are so blessed for parents who are healthy, involved in our lives and nearby.
We'd like to thank sisters, brothers, and the in-laws for their love,friendship,help and connections. Nieces and nephews who also made us want to be parents again and have been awesome cousins to Shawn.
Dias would not even be coming home if it weren't for one person. One person that walked her own path. One person that said no. One person that then said yes. One person can make a difference in this world. One person that stuck her neck out and said please let me help. Susan Cotten is our angel, our hero, our adoption auntie of our children and will forever be in our prayers of thanks. Thank you Susan from the bottom of our hearts forever.
Collene, Olga, and Regina with Journey Home Adoption. You have an amazing team and a wonderful agency. You took on a problem with our adoption but never once did we feel we were a problem. You embraced us, offered support when we needed it (daily) and were totally honest with us every step of the way. We will forever be in your debt and want to repay you and Susan by helping as many of your clients as possible and other adopting families in whatever way we can. Even if we live forever, it would never equal what we feel we owe you.
The Kazakh team of Tatyana, Gulnara, Inessa and Karim. All the people we met along the way in Kazakhstan and our adopted kin. We fell in love with Kazakhstan this adoption in a deeper and more permanent way because of them. The Kazakh government and it's officials. Thank you so much.
All our adoption sisters and brothers. Tracy(who led us to our first son and we will forever thank), Katrina, Temple(who opened the door to son number 2..thanks sweetheart), Ann, Kim, Maggie, Susan, Daphne, Jacqueline, Ros, and all spouses, significant others and their kiddos. Reed family, and all the beautiful friends we only know via email and blogs. How much have we laughed? And cried? How much have we shared the burdens and celebrated the joys? This journey would of been much less meaningful without you and certainly less fun. The ones that went before us paved the road and we followed their light which allowed us to do the same for others. We will all be family via adoption for ever. Our greatest hope is that one day we can share again as our children trek their beginnings together. Our friendships started because of adoption but are not limited to that connection. These are friends for life.
Our social worker Beverley who has been with us since early 2005 when we first met while adopting Shawn. She and her husband Peter-our rockin' notary-God love him, have gone WAY above and beyond. We never mind having to have our follow-up evals done because we get to visit and bask in her years of experience. She is totally supportive and always sees the good in a situation. She also was major support to Susan, which helped her help us. So thank you, thank you and thank you.
All our friends! The ones that said, you are what?????? Are you nuts???? and the ones that hugged us and said how wonderful. No matter which group they were in, every one of them has been nothing but supportive and loving and encouraging. Maybe our life stages veered a different route than most of our friends but wouldn't life be dull if we were all the same? (as my mom always says...)
To all people, known and unknown, that helped us. It amazed and touched us. People who heard about us, people who are themselves adopted, people who knew us and people we went to church with. People that are friends with our parents, people we work with. The list is long. So many beautiful people. Such a gift! Never have we seen the hand of a divine being so apparent as in adoption. We will never forget that or how close it made us feel to God. Even when we experienced sadness, God's love still touched us via His angels on earth. Everyday when we look at our children, we are reminded of this.
Our spouses....I am writing so I will go first. Mike has been such a good dad to my daughter. I never doubted he'd be an awesome dad to more kids. He placed Lauren before his own desires over and over. She calls him Mike but says he is her heart dad forever. He and I kinda agreed before we were married that yes, we'd both wanted larger (or any) families but it did not work out that way, so be it. When I changed the game plan in a major way by asking could we add to our family this dear man, after a few months of thinking as Mike never decides anything quick, agreed to think about it. Then he agreed to think about it harder. Then he was shown a photograph of a little boy 3 continents away in a country we'd never heard of and said he'd think about it. As I write this and we are competing our second adoption, he says he is still thinking about it. You get the picture.......I love you Mike and thank you for making one of my dreams (twice) come true. He is Shawn's best buddy and my best friend. Truly an honorable man in every sense.

If you are still with me, this is long but important for Dias. To have this as it is baby book of sorts starting with the time he became someones child forever.
Mike says just to put it in the record, that he is still thinking about it....and he would of nevered married me 12 years ago if he hadn't loved Lauren, and if he hadn't of thought I was a good mom. Plus, he seems to feel I would of divorced him and done it anyway...that's not true Mike. He says to put it down that his life is richer and fuller and crazier than he ever dreamed, and without the many toys he imagined at this stage in his life....overall, Mike does not need to say anything. All you have to do is see he and Lauren laughing, or he and Shawn hugging and teasing or Dias rubbing his beard and the sparkle in both of their eyes.
We were meant to have this family.
If you are still with me, I apologize for the length, but really this is for Dias anyway. This is his story....

Sunday, January 18, 2009

more photos....



Smell the BBQ






We are finally on US soil. Waiting in the lounge in Memphis. Mike is snoozing and I am writing this.
Our flights were totally uneventful and comfortable. It is amazing the difference in hospitality. KLM staff are so polite and helpful and take such good care of you. They gave us some little gifts for Cameron and Shawn, wished us luck etc. NWA staff acted like they were doing us a favor to serve us a water. TOTALLY different. Oh well.....
We are here and our luggage is too. Amazing since we ran to the gate in Amsterdam with a 30 minute window to change planes. Amazing feat. Our plane was delayed again this a.m. for 3 hours but it left. So after 2 extra days we arrive.
The weather driving to Almaty was pretty bad at times. Gulnara did a wonderful job getting us all there. The delays weren't in the plan but all in all, everything finished fine.
If the families following us have as good an experience as we did, we will be so happy for them. The fact that we even went at all, after we were told it was not possible, is our first miracle. That now, two other families are picking up where they left off in Taldy,is another miracle.
Beverley, you are right...one child does lead to another.
I will return in about 4 weeks to finish this adoption process and travel home with Cameron. It will be so good to see people we now call friends and sad to leave them, maybe forever.....I like to think not.
I think when we get to Memphis I will order BBQ for us and start this child's introduction to the US. We can't wait.
We have had the best experience through all this. i think that we had done this before helped, but Gulnara really did an excellent job. No reason to expect any problems during the waiting period, but we will breathe a deep sigh when it is over. We feel good about it though. Whatever happens, will never change how grateful we are to all the people that worked with us to make this happen.
Cannot wait to send first photos of Shawn and Dias together.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Still in Almaty

We are still here. The weather is the reason this time. Fogged in. We stayed at the airport all morning just to be told "nyet". So off to the Hyatt we go with other travelers and the flight crew at KLM's expense. We might get to leave tomorrow but most likely it will be Monday.
We are at an Internet cafe after walking around down town. So many happy memories from this area as we stayed near here in 2005 with Shawn. Makes us miss him even more.
In the big picture, no big deal.
We have a few more travel tips for those coming next if you get delayed. Learn from our mistakes. Oy vey! Funny stories soon......
Hope to be writing we are in Amsterdam next time I write.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Almaty

Hi all.
We are sitting at an internet cafe after a good Kazakh lunch. Our flight was delayed 24 hrs. with no reason given. It is not the weather, it is beautiful.
So we will leave tomorrow. NO big deal.
If you have adopted here before, you'll understand this....we spent our evening signing papers on the kitchen table, in a car, driving around Almaty for forms and notaries. It is all known to us now, this business style, but still funny to us.
Our apt. is cute. Small and comfortable.
We were given a lovely book on Kazakhstan by Tatyana.
We met a very nice and funny woman named Galina. Kazakh Korean and FUNNY. Such an intersting person with her family and personal history. Exiled, re-educated, rehabilitated etc. Stalin, communism, etc. Living history. Several people we have met in our age group have these stories about their families. Sad, but in the past.
Gulnara continues to be our adopted big sister and is taking good care of us.
Dias did really well when we left amd know next trip it is his turn. It was not as hard to leave this time because he is our son and we just have to go get him.
Already starting paperwork for passport, embassy, new birth certificate with new name. It is all very real now.
Thanks for writing.
Soon.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

More photos..of the 10,000 we took...



Parting shots and thoughts






Dias has so much determination. He could not climb the MOUNTAIN at the playground. He looked and pondered and looked some more. Inessa helped him from the sidelines yelling directions. He plotted slowly and with method. He made it! He was so proud and we cheered like he made the a goal at the World Cups! Then they asked us to move on and not take photographs. No photographs please, in a children's place????? Funny. New Years tree photos. ( I know, it is weird) Gifts for our dear friend Inessa, who finally smiled in a picture. She is so Russian. Mike is having with drawls from Merey's family. He fell in love with them.
We are leaving some children behind in good care doubt-including our own-but to know they have a chance to join their families makes my heart soar! No words can ever express our gratitude to JOURNEY HOME ADOPTIONS, SUSAN COTTEN, COLENE BELLI, REGINA SHELLNUT, OLGA, TATYANA, GULNARA and THE REPUBLIC OF KAZAKHSTAN for our son. We will NEVER forget any of you or the children at the baby house.
Stealing words from another mother, but perfect....our hearts are now on both sides of the globe.
But it feels good to be able to feel this way.

More photos..of the 10,000 we took...




Another awesome day






We had a snow storm blow through but it was nothing compared to our day. We gave gifts out to staff at the baby house, we left donated items, we made photographs at request for staff. I have two new men in my life.
We then took Dias for his passport photos, took him out to lunch at our favorite cafeteia, ad back to our apartment to hang out.We then went to a children's arcade, went to the grocery store and rode the escalator 8 times because Dias LOVES mechanical things. Then back to the apartment for dinner with Inessa and Dias and us. We returned Dias in his new red sweat suit and with his light up shoes that he adores and after many kisses and hugs and reassurance from baby house mommas we left our little son one more but the last, time. He did well and seems to understand. Or was too tired to fuss..... He was holding his new shoes in his lap while we drove back to his home and he looked up at me and said "thank you" perfectly. A perfect moment in time.
Our friend Inessa then presented us with a beautiful tea pot with cups featuring a Kazakh design and said it was to celebrate our new family...our Kazakh family.
Our sons are Kazakh, and now we are adopted Kazakhs to all these wonderful new friends.
We are counting the days till we can have Cameron James Dias Collins join our American family.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Cel-le-brate good times.....cel-le-brate.......








I don't even know where to start! Of course, biggest celebration is courts approval to adopt Dias. There were a few tense moments with the judge barking "Gulnara!" when she did not find something she was looking for in the HUGE stack of papers on her desk. Then there were light moments like when she said to Mike as she read his medical, "I wish I had your blood pressure!".
The judge asked our address 10 times because one page had one number wrong. We started wondering if we knew what our address was!
After court we were treated to a fabulous banquet at a local German restaurant. Hosted by Tatyana our adoption director in Kazakshtan. Then she gave myself and the doctor long stem roses for being Dias' moms....OMG.....tears,hugs, more hugs. Then it was Christmas (Father Frost and Old New Year gift time). The graciousness, the generosity, the fun.
Run around, back to hug Dias and play "kiss-kiss", he covers you with kisses....melt my heart.
All the caregivers, workers, doctors were coming up to us, "well?", and when we said "yes" and gave the thumbs up, they all hugged us. Happy as we are. Especially one who said Dias drove her crazy asking everyday about us coming back.
We were asked to deliver a year book for an exchange student that lives in Taldy and was in Kansas. Arrangements were made to meet her. We thought we would drop off the book, nice to meet you, Paka. Oh no......were we wrong and so glad! Merey lives with her grandparents, dad and nephew. They are nicest people and we had such a good time with them. Grandmother had been cooking all day and expected us to stay. Bishmarak, the national Kazak dish, a yummy noodle and meat dish was served. You have never seen so much food.It just kept coming and coming. Merey is such a lovely, intelligent young woman with perfect English. Her dad was a national boxing champ. it was a perfect evening. Mike did not want to go. The Reed family was all that was missing and Merey almost cries when she talks about her American mom and dad. Our interpreter and driver were included in the merriment as well. Then off to Karim's house for tea and sweets (it is 10:00 p.m. by now) and to see his new daughter. So kreseba! (pretty) We visited and drank more tea and ate more sweets. Our dear friend Inessa had prepared a Korean meal for us that there was no time left to enjoy unfortunately. The hospitality is so genuine and offered so kindly. Our representative has bent over to make sure our stay is comfortable.
After a wonderfully perfect day we settled in for a nights needed rest. A perfect day in every way.
Someone expressed their opinion recently that the experience of adopting in Kazakhstan is not a vacation, that these people could "care less" about our comfort or concerns or complaints. Basically just suffer and remember why you are really here....
We are really here to adopt. Period. Anything else is icing.
But the implication that the professional staff and the Kazakh people don't care, is a gross generalization and in our experience ( 4 times here now) very wrong.
Maybe the person mentioned above is the one that could care less. We see the world as we are...

Monday, January 12, 2009

Good Visit






Our driver always asks "good visit?", and we did have a good visit. We took some things for the children including some dress up hats. They loved them. Dias insisted we wear them too. He loves his play cell phone and camera but then wants the real ones. We have gone over court etiquette, our speeches, the local representative from the Minister of Education was at the baby house this afternoon with a pediatrician not affiliated with the baby house. Our wonderful translator and friend has been with us again. We have court at 9 a.m, Hopefully we know tomorrow the answer to our prayer. Learning more about adoption in general. More to share when we get back. Dias is just happy and sweet and smart. Too adorable. Was able to talk to Shawn for a moment this in on SKYPE and all is well.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Day One






We arrived in Taldykorgan safely. Everything is covered in beautiful snow. The weather is perfect. After a long delay in Amsterdam because of a technical problem, another plane had to be brought in from Washinton. We left Houston at 4 pm Friday and arrived Almaty 8 am making our trip about 40 hours......long ass in any langauge. After a long passport line, Kazakhs don't hurry, we loaded the car amazingly after several arrangements. The drive was fine and Gulnara had new snow tires. We were able to see Dias briefly. He had just awakened from his nap. He blinked as if he were not sure we were real. He ran to me and hugged me and we kissed a lot. He kept kissig my cheek. He told everyone his mama and papa were here. He remembered our names. He has been telling the kids he is going to the USA. They had the their room decorated so cute for Christmas. The staff were so glad we were here and said they talked about us to Dias everyday.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Halfway there....







We had an uneventful trip to Amsterdam. Took a small tour of a wooden shoe and ccheese shoppe and the canals and downtown Amsterdam and the red light district eve.That was interesting. Now we are relaxing in the KLM lounge.
No news from Kaz. which is good news. We are both very tired and will attempt a small nap. We will see Gulnara in a.m. a the airport, then meet with Tatyana for paperwork etc. and weather permitting, head to Taldykorgan.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Off again.........

What a whirl wind week! We were able to get all needed documents processed, notarized and apostilled in record time. Go Olga, Go Olga......Our agency is the hands down, darn best little agency in the world!
This time last year we were just starting our journey to adopt a little boy we felt led to. 8 months later we thought a part of our world had died.
Thanks to Susan Cotten and the best darn agency in the world, we were given another chance. So here we are 12 months from our original start date about to leave for Kazakhstan. To present to court our desire to be granted the privilege to adopt a Kazakh citizen. To change his name and and his culture. It is a strange combination of sadness and loss mixed with hope and joy.
I told someone today I felt like Santa. I am bringing a lot of love and good wishes to Taldy via parents and friends. We are delivering presents, photos, a yearbook to an exchange student, gifts for our friends and donations for the baby house. We have shopping requests from several people and I have photos of caregivers to be identified so families can have names for their children's life books.
We have high hopes to obtain more info for two families hoping to pick back up on adopting children they loved and then lost before adoptions could be completed.
An exciting trip for us and others as well. Our court speeches are done, and practiced. Maybe I can present mine without crying this time......
No matter what happens in that court room next Tuesday, Dias is our child. Forever.
The rest is just temporary hassles.
Not sure if we will have Internet connection this short trip but can go to the Internet cafe.
Please keep us and Dias in your thoughts and prayers. They have gotten us this far. Don't stop now!
Hugs,
Susan